Self-Care for Peri-Menopause: Understanding the Challenges
Recently I’ve been slogging through a book for physicians, Menopause Practice, and I’ve gotta tell ya, it reads like a Stephen King novel. One of the realizations I’ve had is that if I had this information in my 40s (or even younger), I would have done some things differently.
I believe that aging, with information to prepare you for what is to come, can be done gracefully. I warn you to be careful where you look for this information as there is some very poorly researched and harmful information (and products) out there. Recently I told my gyn about what I’m reading and how difficult some of it is as I’m not an MD- I just play one on TV😄. I read Jen Gunter, MD’s book Menopause Manifesto some years ago and really liked it. My dear husband sent me a link to her Substack, The Vagenda (https://vajenda.substack.com/) which I’ve been perusing. I asked my Gyn if she thought Dr. Gunter’s information was good and I was pleased to hear she thought so. I would encourage you to check it out.
Seeking Joy: Tips for Self-Care for Peri-Menopause Freedom
In my last article on perimenopause, I shared a lot of things that can effect us negatively during this time in our lives. Today I want to share some ways that we can choose to reframe this and turn it into something more positive.
Seek pleasure! A year after your last menstrual period you are officially in menopause and you should be good to stop birth control (do check with your gyn). Some women (and people born with a vagina who have sex with people who make semen) report an increase in libido knowing that they can’t get pregnant. They report feeling like the weight of pregnancy has been lifted, making them feel more free and creative.
Setting Boundaries as Self-Care for Peri-Menopause
“I have no f**ks to give!” one of my fabulous clients told me. The menopause transition may be a time when that part of us that used to be really good at censoring what we say and do takes a vacation. Have you been a yes woman, a people pleaser? If so, this may be a great time to experiment with saying no and setting some different boundaries. I know this may be difficult for some of you Southern Belles, but you can do it!
Using Humor as Self-Care for Peri-Menopause Brain Fog
In high school I had a teacher who had four pairs of glasses and would eventually “lose” all of them during the course of the day (she would end up wearing all four pairs on her person). It was funny then, but now I have a lot of empathy for her. Brain fog is an opportunity to find new ways of keeping organized, remembering what you’re supposed to be doing, and why you went into that damn room. Instead of getting angry with yourself, try giving yourself a little grace and using a little bit of humor. We are human, we forget things, it’s a part of life. The more serious we are about brain fog, the more anxious we get, the worse it gets (when anxious it’s hard for us to access our thinking brain), so come at it with some humor and you will most likely see some improvements.
Healthy Habits: Essential Self-Care for Peri-Menopause
Self-care- what does that mean to you? Studies have shown that if we exercise, eat more whole grains, lean meats, fruits and veggies, we’re less likely to get health complications. I have started doing these things, proving that it’s never too late to change- if I can get my butt off the couch and stay away from Mc Donald’s, I bet you can too. That’s just one part of self-care, though. Studies have shown that women have better quality of life if we have friends and use our support system. This is a great excuse to meet some new people! Mindfulness, getting good sleep (you may want to think about sleep training and/or seeing a sleep specialist), spending some time outside (with sunscreen, of course), and getting support for any mental illness or addiction you may struggle with, are all great ways to increase self-care. This is my prescription to you for a better quality of life; it’s time to take care of you now.
Building Support Networks as Self-Care for Peri-Menopause
Come on, Gen X (and beyond)!! Society is just now just starting to realize how important women’s health is. We do not need to be ashamed to talk to each other (and anyone else who will listen) about periods and about the menopause transition. It’s helpful to know you’re not alone in this, so speak it. We can change how this transition is talked about and viewed and make it easier for those who will follow. I was talking to someone at an insurance company and mentioned I was having some memory issues due to menopause and as it turned out she was too, I never thought of finding sisterhood support on an insurance call.
Wishing you happiness and good health!
Mechele
Mechele de Avila Evans, LCSW